- 3:10 p.m.
As promised, PART ONE of WACKY WEEKEND.
My AMAZING girlfriend/same-sex partner/lady-lover/meal-ticket/weekend companion and I had made plans to MEET UP with a veryclose friend of ours who we hadn’t had the chance to HANG WITH lately. This veryclose friend of ours is a CHILDHOOD FRIEND of My AMAZING girlfriend/same-sex partner/lady-lover/meal-ticket/she’s -nearly-forty-and-you’d-never-know-it.
They have known each other since they were Ten. This veryclose friend, I’ll call her GLYNN (not a great alias, but we’ve already established that I’m lousy with alias’s) is how WE met. We, meaning… MY SHE and I. We met through GLYNN.
GLYNN and I worked together manymany years ago… when I used to work…. with people…. In a place. We were both like… oh… 22(ish). We were young(ish) in a world of older, faster people. We learned together. She continued in THAT industry… as she was OBSCENELY TALENTED in THAT way… and has risen to a VERY HIGH POSITION within a very FRESH and SUCCESSFUL company within THAT industry. She’s a VP with loads of cash and power that she uses for good, not evil. She’s beautiful (some would say “hot”, whatever), Married to a guy she loves and they have a young daughter. American Dream and all that. That’s GLYNN.
Many years ago (before you were born), I was still working in THAT industry. I had started a little (fresh) company and we NEEDED someone that did “a particular thing”. GLYNN had a friend. An old friend. A childhood friend. A talented friend that was AMAZINGLY GOOD at “that particular thing”. She introduced ME to her childhood friend. YEP. That was our meeting. Me and SHE. My SHE. GLYNN introduced my SHE to me. We love her for that.
And… even though I was still STRAIGHT (whatever) at the time… and SHE (my SHE) was NOT… we became PLATONIC FRIENDS (that’s what I thought, anyway). Eventually she brainwashed/mind-controlled me out of my formerly-straight life into a life of LESBIAN-LOVE and NEVER-A-DULL-MOMENT. That was almost twelve years ago. Yikes.
So… back to LAST WEEKEND. We were meeting up with GLYNN. She was staying in a town a few hours away… in a hotel and wanted us to come and hang out, grab some dinner, consume some beverages… then crash with her at her hotel.
Okay. Fine. Super. Great.
We meet-up. We share a few cocktails and lots of laughs. We go to dinner. Chips, salsa, entrees, make it a double, on the rocks, no salt… rinse, lather, repeat. More laughs. And another. We make it back to her hotel… We hang out with a few of her work-homies (also VP types, but verycool and REAL). Another round.
And then…. Innocent conversing/laughter between myself and her boss-guy(ish) (a higher-up VP, but you’d never know it by his sneakers). HE was SMART, FUNNY… and a boy. Sometimes that BOY energy is refreshing to just LOOK AT… for an hour… during the end of an evening with drinks. Nobody gets hurt. Everybody ends up with their pre-determined sexual partner… but for several minutes you watch and listen to his stories… be reminded of the way that a 42 year old BOY’s beard grows in after a long day… it’s just… well, something different. It’s like trying a different ROUTE on your way home. You’re not going to SWITCH to that route. You’re not going to END UP at a DIFFERENT home. NO, you’re just examining different scenery… without actually getting out of the car. You don’t even roll down the windows. You’re just looking.
AND… your AMAZING girlfriend/same-sex partner/lady-lover/meal-ticket/weekend companion is just a few feet away and she doesn’t seem to mind and she knows that you LOVE her and are TOTALLY ATTRACTED TO HER… so, it’s not a problem. You’re just looking.
AND….It wasn’t flirting. Just conversing and looking. Conversing with a side order of observation. That was all THAT was. Conversing and looking at a 42-year old MARRIED straight boy with a days worth of beard growing in. Nothing more than that.
Oy!…. and THAT wasn’t even the thing I was going to tell you (the rambling,, it’s a problem… don’t you think??)
So anyway… back to the END of the evening… Okay--- after many beverages and laughs and stories, GLYNN, My AMAZING girlfriend/same-sex partner/lady-lover/meal-ticket/weekend companion and I made our way up to GLYNN’s room.
We sang in the elevator. We laughed some more. FUN. Good times.
GLYNN opens the door to her room (which I THOUGHT would be a SUITE, but it wasn’t, it was a room)… and there it is. A BED. One big bed… and then a single roll-a-way.
Now… here’s the thing. I didn’t know what the plan was… but I didn’t want to Sleep with My AMAZING girlfriend/same-sex partner/lady-lover/meal-ticket/weekend companion in the BIG BED and have GLYNN sleep in the roll-a-way. I wasn’t worried that in a drunken stupor WE would accidentally have a spontaneous “red shoe diaries” episode with GLYNN watching… but I worried that GLYNN might worry about that.
GLYNN and I have never really DISCUSSED my “switchover” to “the other team” in SO MANY WORDS… but of course she KNOWS it happened… and that it’s HER FAULT(thankyouverymuch) that I met the person that caused the SWITCH. And yet…. We’ve never DISCUSSED it. It’s just a FACT that we’re together… and have been for many years… BUT… still… I think that out of ALL our “Straight” friends…GLYNN is the only one that I’d have trouble SLEEPING with My AMAZING girlfriend/same-sex partner/lady-lover/meal-ticket/weekend companion in the BIG BED… in front of.
NOT SURE WHY. It’s just a fact. Whatever. I’ll talk to my therapist(ish) about it tomorrow.
Anyway… though… so…..in our drunken-ness, it was decided that My AMAZING girlfriend/same-sex partner/lady-lover/meal-ticket/weekend companion would sleep in the ROLL-A-WAY and GLYNN and I would share the BIG BED.
Whatever. Where’s my toothbrush?
Okay, briefly I was concerned that I might rollover in the middle of the night and try to spoon her, but I assured myself that it wouldn’t happen.
I’m not a “spooner”, I’m a “spooneee”, anyway.
The three of us each did our own drunken versions of changing into our pajamas(ish) and made it into our spots: (again; with My AMAZING girlfriend/same-sex partner/lady-lover/meal-ticket/weekend companion in the ROLL-A-WAY and GLYNN and I in the BIG BED).
Within minutes, My AMAZING girlfriend/same-sex partner/lady-lover/meal-ticket/weekend companion was FAST ASLEEP… lightly-snoring on her way to dream land. No sheep-counting necessary.
I flipped on the TV and forced GLYNN, not an avid TV Viewer, to SURF the channels with me. I exposed her to THE HOME SHOPPING NETWORK as they were hawking 42” CERAMIC DOLLS (“…the children are so life-like”) and she was horrified. We watched portions of an old LOVE BOAT episode and an Infomercial for a product we weren’t sure was LEGAL. Finally… I announced that I’d had my fill (she was relieved) and we settled into our spots for the night.
I curled up into my frozen shrimp-like-embryo position and hugged my edge of the bed. GLYNN spread out and, if anything, MIGHT have tried to spoon me…at one point, around 3:45 am.
We woke up the next morning, my head shaped like a Margarita Glass… and I KEPT TO MYSELF about the fact that BOTH GLYNN and My AMAZING girlfriend/same-sex partner/lady-lover/meal-ticket/weekend companion had been competing in a TANDEM-SNORING contest that had kept me awake for an hour after BOTH of them were already asleep. It was like dueling banjos. It was both hilarious and harmonious… in a snoring kind of way. No complaint from me, though. I’m thoughtful that way.
So… yeah. It was great to have spent the evening with GLYNN… and we need to see her more often. She’s the reason we met. We headed back to LA and promised to talk again this week about our next “outing”.
Maybe next time I’ll let her see My AMAZING girlfriend/same-sex partner/lady-lover/meal-ticket/weekend companion and I SLEEPING IN THE SAME BED. Maybe even spooning. For more than that, she’ll need to rent videos… or watch “The L Word”.
No big deal, right?
Okay… that’s it for today.
Tomorrow’s Update:Wacky Weekend, Part Two: Another Visit with a Childhood Friend.
Xoxoxo to you and yours!