2004-10-15 - 5:31 p.m.

Hey Kids,

Happy Friday, welcome to your weekend.

(sigh�.)

So anyway�here�s how it�s been. A little slow in the brain lately. And when I say brain I mean, well�.brain activity. And when I say brain activity, I mean� well� productivity, creativity, and quite frankly, anything else that might end in �ivity�.

The solution: A road trip to LAS VEGAS.

NOT a quickie flight, which at this point �aint so quick anymore when you include the standing in line to be scanned and smeared and prodded, then verse vice-a on the way back�. NO� a ROAD TRIP. Pile a few LEZZIES in the car, load up the ITUNES and a few hours later, say hello to Paris and Nikki Hilton who will probably just be finishing up THEIR WEEKEND of spontaneous weddings or sexual encounter videotapings and might just wave to us on their way OUT of town.

Nothing takes your mind off of the lack of things ending in �ivity� in your life like sitting at the blackjack table with strangers (plus my AMAZING Girlfriend/Same-Sex Partner/Lady Lover/Meal Ticket/Much-Better-Gambler-than-Me) and a few other familiar lady-faces. For me, at least.

So I was throwing together some tunes in a PLAYLIST� you know, cheesie, campy, sing along + eclectic surprises, etc when I happened upon some good old (trust me, don�t let me lose you on this) Barry Manilow. (Stop judging me. It�s there for the CHEESE factor). (and just so you don�t continue judging�because you know you are�judging, I�ll tell you that my itunes contain everyone from Angie Stone to Tori Amos to Ben Harper to Death Cab for Cutie to Tegan and Sara to Dashboard Confessional to Helen Reddy to Dixie Chicks to Saves The Day to Damien Rice to Joni Mitchell� and yes, Melissa Etheridge and kd lang.Whatever. Stop judging.)

ANYWAY--I found a song, not one for the ROAD TRIP playlist, but one that upon listening, really struck me as actually RINGING TRUE for what my little soul has been going through. So�.I let it play thru, and by the end I was WEEPING (real tears!).

I�m going to share the lyrics (found through a google search. Stop judging me) below, and hope that I can put this little �find� of mine into my own personal log, to remind me when ALL THE WORDS, THOUGHTS and PROJECTS are flowin�� that there were/are times when it�s not so flowin.

So, for myself and anyone who is NOT judging.
((NOTE: for those still with me, be assured that it ain�t �my woman� that I�m worried �bout tryin to get back, it�s my�well�a part of�some kind of creative SOUL thing)):

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"Trying to get the Feeling again" by Barry Manillow (whatever! stop judging)

Doctor my woman is comin' back home late today
Could ya' maybe give me something?
'cause the feelin' is gone
and I must get it back right away
before she sees that I've been

Up, down, tryin' to get the feelin' again
All around tryin' to get the feelin' again
The one that made me shiver,
Made my knees start to quiver
Everytime she walked in
And I've looked high, low,
everywhere I possibly can
but there's no tryin' to get the feelin' again
it seemed to disappear as fast as it came

I read every book, looked,
through every meditation and poem
just to bring back home, that old sweet sensation
But it ain't no use to me, tryin' to get that feelin' again
Up, down, tryin' to get the feelin' again
up, down, tryin' to get the feelin' again

where did it run to?
I thought I'd done all that I could
Just to keep the lovelight burnin'
But whatever I've done I guess
I just haven't done it too good
'cause all that's left is yearnin'

And I�ve been
Up, down, tryin' to get the feelin' again
All around tryin' to get the feelin' again
The one that made me shiver,
Made my knees start to quiver
Everytime she walked in
And I've looked high, low,
everywhere I possibly can
but there's no tryin' to get the feelin' again
it seemed to disappear as fast as it came

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So, indeed....Viva Las Vegas. Get the feeling again. Whatever. We�re actually not leaving until Monday (don�t ask) and we�ll be back Wednesday. Weekend commitments sometimes can interfere with Road Trips to Vegas. So there.

Wishing ALL OF YOU a WONDERFUL weekend, in the meantime.

����PS and Important but not as private as I�d like it to be and yet it seems to be the only way to do this (all you kind other folks just continue on with what you were doing):
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RACHEL- dear, brilliant, still young, but not-quite-as-young-as-you- used-to-be, RACHEL. Please e-mail me. I don�t have your email, so you�ve gotta email me. Just click that little link on the Left side of this page. Go ahead. I�m waiting. Thanks.
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Xoxoxo Me